The Online Samurai

"The emotionally intelligent person knows that love is a skill, not a feeling, and will require trust, vulnerability, generosity, humor, sexual understanding, and selective resignation. The emotionally intelligent person awards themselves the time to determine what gives their working life meaning and has the confidence and tenacity to try to find an accommodation between their inner priorities and the demands of the world. The emotionally intelligent person knows how to hope and be grateful, while remaining steadfast before the essentially tragic structure of existence. The emotionally intelligent person knows that they will only ever be mentally healthy in a few areas and at certain moments, but is committed to fathoming their inadequacies and warning others of them in good time, with apology and charm. There are few catastrophes, in our own lives or in those of nations, that do not ultimately have their origins in emotional ignorance." ~ Alain de Botton

I'm a little in over my head but can't hold back no more. I'm a little bit scared to death cause I ain't been her before. I'm a little bit unsure what the hell I'm supposed to do. I'm a little trying to write this letter, trying to get it right but it might turn out all wrong but I'm whole lot in to you. The words on this page all look like a mess but they fall short of what I'm trying to confess. My heart is racing as it already knows what I haven't even told you yet. What if I say it and you just laugh What If I say it and you say it back I don't want to sleep around with every girl in the world. I want a girl worth waking up to.

Thought experiment It is supposed that the famous ship sailed by the hero Theseus in a great battle was kept in a harbor as a museum piece, and as the years went by some of the wooden parts began to rot and were replaced by new ones; then, after a century or so, every part had been replaced. The question then is whether the "restored" ship is still the same object as the original. If it is, then suppose the removed pieces were stored in a warehouse, and after the century, technology was developed that cured their rot and enabled them to be reassembled into a ship. Is this "reconstructed" ship the original ship? If it is, then what about the restored ship in the harbor still being the original ship as well?🤔 The thought puzzle arises because of extreme external-ism : the assumption that what is true in our minds is true in the world. This is not an unassailable assumption, from the perspective of the natural sciences, because human intuition is often mistaken. Co...

I find it unnerving when society confounds intelligence with career. The idea that doctors are smarter than teachers. Or Lawyers more intelligent than bus conductors. I know this is what 8-4-4 teaches, but it is faulty. Who you become is shaped by opportunity & preparedness. A bus conductor with the lawyer's experiences WOULD make a lawyer. A man with the bus conductor's experiences and limitations WOULD make a bus conductor. This implies that the potential is not immutable. And that there has to be a positive foundation for impact to be realized. Take me for example, I love and enjoy reading. But when you trace my background, I had the opportunity & preparedness for it. I had a mother who was about to complete her diploma at Mombasa Polytechnic, & she would take me to their library thus I had easy access to the library. So when my introversion needed an escape, it was readily available to me in the form of library. Now, a child with my character in Kathonzweni migh...

Knowing how to live with depression is important for many of us — with more than 300 million people across the globe living with chronic depression, it’s the leading cause of disability worldwide. It’s time to go beyond getting a diagnosis, into giving people actual coping mechanisms. Without coping mechanisms, we’re trapped in a downward spiral. Being depressed leads to falling behind; falling behind leads to more depression. 1. Be proactive. It’s a cliche because it’s true — the best defense is a vigorous offense. Do you know what you’ll do the next time you’re depressed?  In order to make a plan, you need to know two things: your symptoms of depression and the strategies that work for you, 2. Zoom in on what’s most important for you to accomplish. Urgency isn’t only about getting things done, It’s “also about being able to say no to non-essential tasks. Meeting your work deadline is essential; the church bake sale is non-essential. Don't say yes to everything. 3. Figure out the...

I remember when you were younger & your mother proudly introduced you to guests. Now she hides you from the world - when she is not hiding from you. Her cheeks, once succulent with hope, now hang precariously. You must quit Khat and Alcohol. You have caused enough pain.  Such was a time when your father laughed with you, and your sister laughed around you. Now, they dread your company. Your arrival triggers worrying glances and stern countenance. They had a son and a brother, now they have a burden to be kept at arm's length. It is time. I'm finally seeing what my father really is and he's finally seeing me for what I really am; Scared. It's harder to disappoint your father than to let him know he disappointed you.

Money is an object of strong attraction. He who finds his highest happiness in counting and recounting his treasures — will be likely to begin early to introduce the same craving desires into the mind of his offspring. The youth will be drilled in the arts of business. The associations of business and the chances of bargaining will regularly court his attention, and a great fortune will be represented as the ground of respectability, and the source of influence and pleasure. Under such a training, what wonder that in the mind of youth all other considerations, but the simple one of acquiring wealth, should be forgotten and obliterated. But there are other considerations; and as high as your hopes may rise, and as bright as may be your anticipations of lucre or renown — there are subjects of still higher import, objects which should more strongly attract the soul. Even, were the earthly object obtained — were the thing, coveted so eagerly, obtained, how soon must you relinquish it: ...

The aim of the scam is to encourage those who get a missed call to ring the number, after which they will be ripped off as the call will be re-routed to premium rate number overseas & will be subsequently billed exorbitant sums for listening to pre-recorded messages. What should you do if you get a suspected Wangiri call? If you receive calls like this, be assured that you haven’t been specifically targeted. It’s likely that the fraudster has generated a missed call to a whole range of mobile numbers that happens to include yours. We recommend that you don’t return calls to international numbers that you don’t recognise. Calls to Wangiri numbers will often result in a charge being incurred and encourage the fraudster to generate more missed calls to customers who choose to call back.If the worst happens and you return the Wangiri call, we encourage you to call your mobile service provider, explain the situation & help them block some of these numbers.

"We do not play chess to keep all your pieces alive and win with all your material intact. We trade, make sacrifices, with just one goal: checkmate! ".  If I could transfer all my wisdom into someone else's head and they received it all in an instant, I believe most would go utterly insane in an almost near instant from the barrage of dark and perverse poetry. That's what wisdom does; makes the weak insane, and the strong weird. Weirdness then is just knowing what the crazy people know without becoming unhinged and paranoid.Insanity = cannot handle the truths they've discovered, find themselves in existential crisis & nihilism prone Insanity = cannot handle the truths they've discovered, find themselves in existential crisis & nihilism.

I'm thankful for the gift of life. Earlier today I saw a tweet that said, "Ever since the pandemic started, I haven't lacked anything." I really felt that. I also watched the 7PM news and saw a story about a man who has been feeding via a tube/pipe for the last 12 years or so and suddenly it dawned on me how lucky I am.  It is simply God's grace that I am alive, healthy and safe. I won't take it for granted and certainly will try to be thankful for the 'little' blessings that the most High bestows upon my life. It's at this point in time that I remember the lyrics from a talented American RnB artist, Jordin Sparks who I actually wonder where she is nowadays; "One Step at a time, there's no need to rush...."

Kyalo had just finished high school and was looking for employment. Being the first born in a family of six, he knew he had to get a job to help his parents and his siblings. His father was a peasant farmer while the mother was a house wife. People like Kyalo didn't dream of joining college. Their only goal in life was getting a job, get married and fill the earth as instructed by God in the Bible. It is just the way things were in Kathiani, Machakos County. After working odd jobs, buying goats, reselling the goats after a while and saving his profits, Kyalo decided it was time to go look for greener pastures in Mombasa where his Uncle Kimanzi resided. He had heard stories of how easy it was to get a well paying job in the coastal town. After all, his Uncle was uneducated yet worked at Kenya Ports Authority and was one of the richest people in Kathiani. Maybe, just maybe Kyalo would follow in his footsteps... Kyalo bid his family goodbye and embarked on his journey of financial fre...

Add caption "If only I hadn't made the dumb decision to wash clothes at 11pm I wouldn't be in this mess." Kinyua regrets. Decisions have consequences and lately he's been making bad ones or has he? Earlier during the day Kinyua was idling at his chill spot AKA base pondering where his next meal was going to come from. A sly-looking guy came to the base, bought his Ketepa and started chewing the precious 'delicacy'. After a few pleasantries here and there, the guy offers to buy Kinyua's cap at a meagre KSHs 150. At first Kinyua is disinterested but knowing very well how his favorite cap is just but a luxurious item with sentimental value he agrees to the deal. Fast forward curfew time approaches. Kinyua goes home and cooks every Kenyan bachelor's daily meal: Sukuma wiki, Eggs and Ugali. Satisfied he partakes in the activity he's been waiting for since the mystery man bought his cap. Chewing Khat! The high hits and he starts doing house chores. A...

The streets are empty and no matatu is in sight. "Fuck! That nigga has finessed me!", Irie laments. He doesn't even have any money on him to buy his daily stash of weed which puts him to sleep. He looks at his packet of muguka and sighs. The green leaves he's been chewing since afternoon are almost finished, could last him only about half an hour tops. "This wasn't meant to happen, this couldn't happen, this is happening." He wakes up from the spot he's been sitting strategically waiting for Salim and picks his water bottle not knowing where exactly he's going to. It's about 1 am and he now faces the gruesome reality of sleeping in the streets. His single mabati room was locked earlier in the day for being one month late in paying rent. "Landlord leo umenifika kwenye koo." Raising Kshs 2000 is no mean feat for a conductor but Mungu ni nani, he had the money one hour ago. "Fanya aje nijenge hio 2k cash Uko na...

Inbound marketing is just one part of a larger movement in the business world. That movement is inbound. Inbound is a method of attracting, engaging, and delighting people to grow a business that provides value and builds trust.  As technology shifts, inbound guides an approach to doing business in a human and helpful way.  Inbound is a better way to market, a better way to sell, and a better way to serve your customers. Because when good-for-the-customer means good-for-the-business, your company can grow better over the long term. The inbound methodology is composed of three stages: attract, engage, and delight. Inbound businesses use the methodology to build trust, credibility, and momentum. It’s about adding value at every stage in your customer's journey with you.  From a business perspective, the methodology represents the growth of your business, and happy customers provide the energy that fuels that growth, either because they buy from you again or because ...

No natural behavior! Everybody is showing up and doing what they don't want to do and have a connection to. That's the problem with our society, and what is the reward for this? Go home and get a big TV, Go home you're going to get a nice purse, you're going to get shoes that you couldn't afford last week. You're going to get that dream car. Every week we are chasing down this new object and every week we're trying to fill this hole, this sad shadow of life that we have left after work. You work 8 to whatever hours per day plus commuting and then you're like this? That's your real life? All that stuff is not your life anymore. All that stuff is work. And most of us have committed to that. You are just a piece of a heartless, shitty machine that makes money. Don't let anybody fool you that there's a guarantee, That there is a safe way! Be different and unique. I know because I have been there before and I understand it's a trap be...

Ita waiter Ita waiter... We all sang to the major hit by the self-proclaimed Super producer, super Mc and super D.J Madtraxx. I would rather think of him as the Kenyan Fat Joe. Hassan, Omollo and myself had finally landed our first jobs after campus. Knowing that jobs are hard to come by in the country unless you have "connections" , we decided to celebrate of this auspicious achievement by binging on cupious amounts of alcohol. Hassan being the non-alcoholic guy he is, was sipping his chilled Del-Monte mango juice while the real kings Omollo and myself drank our warm pilsner beers. It was only right that we went to the best joint along Moi Avenue cause we weren't yet up that social life ladder to party in those high class lounges and restaurants in Westlands known as the party district of Nairobi where socialites, politicians, musicians, bloggers, twitter bigwigs and those twitter hunnies looking for sponsors all meet and take selfies only to post pictures with lots ...

To wake up the first time in a new place can be like another birth, well not the gruesome picture of a woman wailing and the doctors urging her to push harder, rather the confusion of emerging from a dream and realizing you are in unfamiliar territory. This morning, my ears were filled with a high clear sound; it was a little while before I knew it was from a nearby Mosque. The room was dim lit; the ceiling was high and the walls far away. How I got here was still a mystery much like the Halloween mystery of the creative director missing. Being a good copy detective I knew it was only a matter of time before I established my coordinates ; sounds a bit James 'Bondish' right? I know I know, just watched Spectre and I can't help it. Back to the room I was in , I woke up from the cold floor and realized I was still in a drunken stupor, must have been the whisky from last night! Being a senior odds hunter at sportpesa I knew very well that gambling and alcohol do not mix. I reme...

You know you must and should dump her. She has broken your heart in very small pieces and all your friends have told you but you remember her mouthhugs which makes you possesed. You know how she twerks at high-end joints with her brazilian weave almost falling off but you are still with her. That my friend is Pussification ! Pussification is when a chic comes to your bedsitter at daybreak after a night out with big bellied 'sponsors' and you take her smelly ass in. You can't think, you can't stop texting her never replying butt. You become an idiot and a man who can't think clearly and objectively. All over this city, you see men in 'relationshits' with these socialites aka prostitutes that have pussified them completely. When a man gets good head from a whore and he gets stuck for life with her. The chic will worship twitter bigwigs all for event tickets. You will see the chic flirting on her timeline but you convince yourself that she is just having fun....

'Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect. ' - Mark Twain. I honestly don't know why I quoted Mark Twain there but here goes. Just from a night out at around 3am; wee hours huh? Myself and three pals David, Kevin and Leakey boarded a taxi to take us home. It was one of those days where all you wanted was to get to your bed and sleep like other normal people. As we approached our estate, we all realised we had no money to pay the cab guy; Uber and Easy Taxi hadn't entered the market yet! We quickly hatched a plot to run as soon as we alighted. On arrival at the estates' gate, we flung wide the doors of the taxi and everybody ran in different directions so as to confuse the cab guy. I however made the biggest mistake by sprinting on a straight path while my friends disappeared in some nearby bushes. The cab driver saw this as an opportunity to get one of us and immediately drove towards me. Well, the legend Mark Twa...

The following takes place between 0600 hrs and 2100 hrs East African time. "You better pay your rent tomorrow or you'll be evicted ! ", Deno wakes up thinking about those words from his Landlord yesternight. He plugs in his Samsung smartphone in his ampex sub-woofer. He ponders whether to listen to Matatu fm, Capiroo or HBR. Maybe I should listen to Hope fm he contemplates as the past few months have been a living hell. Yes, he has the power to read but no job to feed him. Tunes to Matatu F.M The discussion is about boyfriends who don't treat their lovers to fancy dinners, buying gifts and what not. Damn ! He remembers Lisa who texted him last night saying that they should talk. Words that every Kenyan man dreads. Deno steps into the bathroom which also doubles up as his lavatory. Within three minutes he is done. He knows pretty well that he can't afford to waste water due to increment in his monthly water billing. He scrolls down his whatsapp texts as he pre...